Album: Rocket to Russia
Year: 1977
. . .
One of the things I truly loved about Rocket to Russia was just how funny it was. Song after song described ridiculous situations — opening with “there’s no stopping the cretins from hoppin'” and closing with “now she’s lying in a bottle of formaldehyde” — made even more ridiculous by the contrast between Danny Fields’ iconic cover shot of four dour young men standing a brick wall and John Holmstrolm’s ridiculous drawings on the inner sleeve, and especially the back cover.
Years later, I would learn that the dourest of those four young men, Johnny, pretty much conceptualized that back cover, which might account for the now-problematic caricatures in the drawing.
In any event, if you were a smart-ass pre-lobotomized teenager who had grown up reading Mad Magazine and was in the process of discovering National Lampoon, you were basically the target audience for the jokes. (Waves hands wildly.)
And probably my favorite joke on the record is the entirety of “We’re A Happy Family,” right down to Holmstrom’s amazing drawing, which utterly captivated me with both its weirdness and grotesqueness. I still have that copy of Rocket to Russia — it meant too much to me to sell when I sold my vinyl two months before the vinyl revival — so I figured I’d share it with you.
Over a typically ferocious Johnny riff, Dee Dee and Tommy keeping up just fine, Joey sings about what we would now call a reality show family, leading with the chorus:
We’re a happy family
We’re a happy family
We’re a happy family
Me, Mom and Daddy
We’re a happy family
We’re a happy family
We’re a happy family
Me, Mom and Daddy
Of course, you instantly don’t believe him, because this is a Ramones song, so you’re probably not surprised when in the next verse, Joey explains just how happy they truly.
Sitting here in Queens
Eating re-fried beans
We’re in all the magazines
Gulpin’ down Thorazines
We ain’t got no friends
Our troubles never end
No Christmas cards to send
Daddy likes men
I mean if “we’re in all the magazines / gulpling down Thorazines” isn’t a top 5 Ramones couplet, I don’t know what is. And probably the first — and maybe even the last — time anybody ever rhymed “magazine” and “thorazines” in a song. And while I love Johnny’s guitar at that moment, Joey just tosses it off like it’s nothing. That’s because he’s got more things to say.
Daddy’s telling lies
Baby’s eating flies
Mommy’s on pills
Baby’s got the chills
I’m friends with the President
I’m friends with the Pope
We’re all making a fortune
Selling Daddy’s dope
I’m not going to lie: this is a lot of words for a Ramones song, but that just makes it funnier. Also making it funnier: the last minute of the song, where they chant “we’re a happy family / we’re a happy family / Me, Mom, and Daddy” about 150,000 times while a panoply of sound effects start burbling up like scenes from the happy family’s life. My favorite is a baby crying right on beat. My second favorite is Joey asking “Hey, where are my socks? Hey, where are my underwears?”
Why is this song different from all other Ramones songs?
It’s like a reality tv show about a dysfunctional famous family come to life. Except, in 1977, that kind of thing didn’t exist. So, it’s way ahead of its time.
Oh, and one more thing: on the original album version, “We’re A Happy Family” faded out, but on the CD reissues, they let it go all the way to the end after which someone — Joey, I think — “”here are my safety pins? what did you do with my safety pins? What is this?”
And this brings up a mystery. Like I said, I don’t remember “We’re a Happy Family” ending from the original vinyl, which I played a zillion times in the late 70s / early 80s, but according to the outer sleeve, it’s 2:47, whereas on the CD reissues, it’s 2:40. Which makes no sense. How can the longer version of a song be shorter? My best guess is that they fucked up with the timing back in 1977. This is when I wish I had a turntable, though, so I could verify my memory of the fade-out.
Oh wait, I just found the version on YouTube from 1988’s Ramones Mania, and it’s only 2:31 and has the fade-out, verifying my memory and proving that they got the timing wrong on the original pressings. Whew!
“We’re a Happy Family”
“We’re a Happy Family” live in London, 1977
“We’re a Happy Family” live in Germany, 1978
“We’re a Happy Family” live in Finland, 1988
The Certain Songs Database
A filterable, searchable & sortable somewhat up to date database with links to every “Certain Song” post I’ve ever written.
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The Certain Songs Database
A filterable, searchable & sortable somewhat up to date database with links to every “Certain Song” post I’ve ever written.
Certain Songs Spotify playlist
(It’s recommended that you listen to this on Spotify as their embed only has 200 songs.)
Support “Certain Songs” with a donation on Patreon
Go to my Patreon page
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